Somewhere in my body, something is miscommunicating. And somehow it’s holding me back from moving forward and getting healthy. The normal way doesn’t work, so it’s time for a different approach:

Reverse gear means for me, not giving in too easily to the tricks my body is pulling. All alarms are going off without any reason as I wrote in my blog “Fire and oranges”. That blog was about smell and taste. Senses are alternating between good and bad, the same goes for sight and hearing.

My senses seem to be uncontrollable, but maybe my body sensations are controllable. When I’m resting in bed or sitting on the couch and I get palpitations or stuffiness out of nowhere and without a reason. I get up and go out for a short walk or ride on my spinning bike. I try to do something that should trigger that sensation in my body. When I’m tired I go out for a little walk. When I get dizzy during my walk, I start to do things that could trigger dizziness even further. Like spinning around and standing on one foot.

I know I need my rest, and I take that very seriously because my battery is deficient and remains in that state when I don’t act on it. So when I pull tricks to trigger my body to act in a more common and usual way, I do this in a dosed way. When I go out for a walk, it will be 1 km or less. When I go for a little ride on my spinning bike, it will be in low gear for a max of 5 minutes. Just enough to learn my body to react to the right trigger. And I sleep for almost 1-2 hours afterwards.

My increased sleep has been here for over a year. And it isn’t any different from the days I wasn’t doing this new way of triggering my brain. Normally I get tired and need to go to bed after one or two activities.

As the doctor said, I need to do something about my tiredness and sleep to achieve the above layers in the pyramid. I think in the case of Long Covid-19, it’s a mix. I also try to improve my life quality by using part of my executive skills to train my awareness, concentration, memory, and speed of processing information to create more harmony. This goes in a dosed way, alternating between mental and physical activities, rest, sleep, and meditation.

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DAPHNE IN STOCKINGS is a writer with a blog telling her story about surviving blood clots, living with FVL, blood thinners, and stockings. And coping with Covid-19 twice in 2020. She's telling her story about building resilience in a physical and mental struggle to heal.